Jun 3, 2010

as i said...



be in a relationship because you know your heart is truly with that person.. not because that person is ur escape goat to all your problems!! U idiot!


Yes, if u noticed, this statement above was the exact status i wrote on my Facebook last night... and i guess u hafta admit that the statement contained some truth... one thing i dont understand is... (and i discussed this with Shah before) how a person's heart can change so fast and so easily... i just dont get it.. i used to be one of those people, but when i view it on a third person point of view, i felt like... wht did i do ... why was i like that.. and i think to myself.. *what a wonderful world...* hahaha....no.. i think to myself.. was i doing the right thing? or was i being selfish? i just wanna share my personal experience to you as to why i think i was being selfish...

When i was in form 3, i met this wonderful guy.. yeah, we were in da same school... let him be anonymous .. i never expected it to happen.. i really wasn't seeking for love at that moment, but .. it just came.. and i embraced it.. we lasted for one whole year... but that one year was a blast! sure, i made some silly actions... but nevertheless... i am thnkful that God gave us the chnce to meet each other.. but i am already settle with the fact that we are only meant to be friends.. and that was proven to be better,,, =) and i am glad that he is just a friend of mine... whti wasnt ready was when i found out he has another gf while he was with me... i felt very hurt but at the same time, my heart longs for vengence.... and i guess i got my vengence.. just not to the person involved. but to another innocent heart... yeah, poor guy right... but then, come to think of it.. i wasnt beautiful nor was i attractive, so who was i to play a man's heart... so, i vowed never to fall in love with a guy so easily.. but to no avail...

so i entered form 4.. then i met a guy.... i dnt know why or even how i fell for this guy.. but i was letting myself being cheated on... and that was so foolish of me.. but yeah, finally i see the light and the right path... but it was too late.. so, i got out of the school... then, i said.. okay.. im getting the vengeance out of my system and dont wnt my next relationship to be based on vengeance... cz im never gonna fell happy with that kind of relationship... and finally...

when i was in Form 5., i was destined to meet an amazing guy from RMC.. and i guess, he opened my heart and till now we r still together... i am with him because I WANT TO BE WITH HIM... not using him as an escape goat... and alhamdullillah.. our relationship is going strong.. stronger than any of my previous relationships before.. and this is because our relationship is based on the purity of the heart and our love that we share for each other.. and for that, i thank you sayang... MUHAMMAD BUKHARI SHAARI, you are totally an amazing guy... and i love you with all my heart.. i really do....

*you see, when u dont find love, love will come looking for you.. and hopefully bringing along the right person for you.. dont use excuses like.. im lonely, i need company... that is just bullshit... bullshit i tell you!! u're not the only one who is lonely, and it doesnt give you the right to play someone else's heart...

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

anonymous likes this

~20.09.09~ said...

anonymous : thnx for the liking... but why anonymous??