smiling... a fake smile...

السلام عليكم

sometimes in life when you r forced to put a smile on your face just to please people...? yeah... i know how that feels.. when your heart gets shattered like hell... and all you want to do is cry... but then, you must show that you are strong. and never cry... like Rihanna's song... Cry--

This time was different
Felt like I was just a victim
And it cut me like a knife
When you walked out of my life
Now I'm in this condition
And I've got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what you'll never see me cry

But then again... i feel i am constantly crying... in my heart... i cn not concentrate in class anymore... i dont even know whts wrong with me and why it affects me so dearly.. i guess maybe because he is still beating in my heart.. n my heart still longs for him... but he is the one who is ignoring... oh well... believe it or not, i am still stupidly waiting for him..

its true wht shah said in his blog, there's always a song that can describe our feelings even when we dont have the words for it... even when we just dont know how to explain it... it can either be sad, or happy or even angry.. but the thing is.. there's every song for every emotions that is running in us all the time.. and when i feel sad, i hear all kinds of songs that just helps me ease my feelings and not go into depression mode... i cnt help it when i am depressed.. but then again.. wht is there to be depressed about? rite? i guess i just have too many problems... n i myself cnt handle it sometimes... but i guess that is life... rite? LIFE.... purpose of life,....

i should be thankful with wht i have now.. my dad just got promoted to be a 1-star general..(alhamdullillah.....) my mom was also promoted last year as a Penolong Kanan... i have 2 beautiful elder sisters who loves me so much.. i have friends that care for me and are always with me all the time.. i am blessed with a great life... then, why am i so ungrateful?? why am i so unthankful with what i have... SHAFIRA,OPEN YOUR EYES!!! WAKE UP & TAKE ACTIONS!!! this is my life..

yes, i do admit that i still have feelings for this guy.. but then , i am willing to wait... now you know how stupidly stupid i am...but then i cnt help it... let it be.. let it go with the flow.. but on his birthday... i promise to find something special for him... u'll see... i just hope he likes it... dats all..... anyways.. this is the song that i've been listening to for quite a while...

~ CINTA JANGAN KAU PERGI.~ (sHIMA)
Kusedari
Kesalahan ini
Yang membuat segalanya
Gelap jadinya

Oh... oo... kasihku
Kuharap kau mahu
Memaafkan menerima pengakuanku

Jangan kau diam lagi
Ku tak sanggup menahan
Bicaralah kau sayang
Jiwa ini tak tenang

Cinta jangan kau pergi
Tinggalkan diriku sendiri
Cinta jangan kau lari
Apalah erti hidup ini
Tanpa cinta dan kasih... sayang

Harap crik2 la lagu tu kt youtube... mmg sgt2 sedih lagu nye.. i like the lyrics of the song..
if i am not mistaken, this is a longer post compared to others since quite a while... oh well.. mybe now i have the time to write it..

semoga berjumpa lagi... السلام عليكم