Dec 13, 2010

~A smile ..~

Alhamdullillah... my laptop is now up and running... thank you to my dad.... he bought the charger for my laptop yesterday... now my mom can really stop worrying about me using her laptop.. ahakz... anyways... i realized that i have a lot of unexpressed anger in me in which i don't even know where it starts... (Okay..i lied... mybe i do know where it starts...) but yeah.... this blog is where i pour all my heart's content because sometimes you can't discuss what happens in your heart with other people... not that you don't trust them.. its just that sometimes they don't understand the situation you are in and it will irritate you to explain the thing to them before getting to the real point... ahakz.... now for some things to be cleared...

POINT #1
i believed all my anger started way before i start my holiday.... i feel this somewhat stress pressed over my shoulders... (I got the whole world in my hand...i got the whole wide whole in my hand..) and it just gave me extra pressure... this point number one has something to do with my recent breakup... and i have to tell you, at first, it was hard to accept the fact because i loved him so much..and i guess to much for that matter.. and when someone you loved dumped you just like that, and talk bad about you... yeah.. that is where i draw the line... i never expected him to change 100% but that was he did... everything i said he took it aggressively... he is sssoo not helping me forget him..he's just making it worse... i know when people say if you still keep in contact with your ex, the feeling will still be there... the known fact is, i am way over him..for some actions and some stuff he said to me... which will never make me take him back in my life... and if i will, i am pretty sure my mom and sisters will kill first before i do... :) they never expected this type of attitude from him..let alone after all that we have done for him... never thought this is how we are being repaid. but then again, I can't raise this matter because then he said i didn't do it with good intentions.. but he is behind me and all i am asking is for the friendship that we have... he's to ego and he's always angry at everything... and from his picture, i can see that he is not happy... but what can i do..? he is pushing me far away from him and there is nothing that i can do.
ouh well....

POINT #2
now i think i may have offended someone just recently visited my blog and i apologize for that... i did mention above i have anger problem.... i guess that because i can't say it to anyone, i expressed in on my blog.. i didn't mean any harm.,..im very sorry.... i have more to explain about this point 2...but i hvae been on the laptop for quite a while.. so, i think i have to go off now... iwill explain more....

3 comments:

intan.liana said...

shaf, i never knew bout your breakup. i'm so sorry for you. be tough k? i know youre strong :)

Shafira said...

thnx intan.. i think i am over it.. cme sikap dye je wat shaf terkilan... if u read my post yg bawah this one, nnty intan tawu... :)

intan.liana said...

hehe. dah baca :)
takpe. maybe you deserve someone better,
just wait and pray :)